When it Rings Will You Answer?

One and One and One is Three

Archive for May 2013

There is a crack in everything.

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“What exactly is it that you want out of life?”

“I want to be happy. It’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

“That’s all anybody wants. You’re not different. You’ve just given up.”

“I haven’t given up. I’ve just realized that I am the only unhappy person I know.”

“You cannot possibly be that self-centred and delusional. It is unfathomable to me that you would actually believe that to be true.”

“It is true. Look at me. I am surrounded by the shiny and the happy. The sleeping fools too selfish to wake from their dreams to notice the nightmare swallowing the rest of us.”

“Oh, so now it is an us? I thought you were the only unhappy one? Or are you just the most miserable of the bunch? Christ. Put down the whiskey, Edgar Allan and step outside. These shiny and happy people willfully perpetuating your nightmare aren’t sleeping. They aren’t living in a dream. They are living their lives. The lives they’ve worked hard to establish. Who are you to beat them down because they happened to have found happiness before you have? How do you even know that they’re happy? For all you know, they could be as woeful as you. Besides, what have you done to work towards this ever elusive happiness you so desperately seek?”

“I’m finished with this conversation. You just want to attack me. I’m looking for support.”

“You aren’t looking for support. You’re looking for sympathy. You’re looking for excuses. I’m not willing to make them for you any more. Fix your head, man. You were happy once. I remember you then. You were an absolute delight. Your positivity got you through any door and your smile lit the room on the other side. But this person in front of me, man,  I barely recognize. You’re a shell, and a broken one to boot. You have given up. You’ve gotten so far gone, most of us have stopped bothering to chase you. Stop running. You say you want support? Prove it. Accept it. Stop looking for it in that goddamn bottle. She left you and it sucks. Don’t let that ruin you. Just come home.”

“I’m not ready.”

“Well then let us know when you are, but for chrissakes, don’t wait too long. You’re lost, I know, but we all are in our own way. You are not alone and you certainly aren’t the only person to ever feel as low as you do right now. Understand that and you’ll start to see that light again.”

“I’m trying. I haven’t given up. I know you think I have, but I haven’t. I am looking for that first step. It’s out there, I just haven’t seen it yet. It’s dark. I’m waiting for that light.”

“It will come. It’s like Leonard told us, there is a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in. Light always finds a way to break through. Keep the faith in life, and I will keep the faith in you.”

“Love you, Pops.”

“Ditto, Kiddo.”

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Written by josiahh

May 7, 2013 at 5:45 PM